From the Pinnacle to the Pit

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

A month. Merely a month he was in this position and it felt like the world was at his fingertips. So far there were no whispers, no weird glances besides the usual ones. Everything had gone according plan. What plan, you might ask? Well, that was for Alpha to know and for you to guess. And guess you would never.

The man walked through the halls, his halls, of the temple. Everything suddenly made perfect sense. He let his hands slide over the dark, cool stone. It felt like it was humming underneath his fingers, as if it tried speaking with him. Communing perhaps. A way of Renestrae to show she was pleased. It made him smile. The High Priest turned a corner, walking towards the entrance. He stood there for a moment, hands clapsed behind his back as he overlooked the gardens surrounding the Church. Yes, everything was going wonderfully.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

It was bad, today.
Eli had accepted the bad days. It was one of the many side effects that had come when he started studying dark magic. Besides the ache in his body and the restless nights. Today it wasn’t physical hurt though, it was just his thoughts spiraling. Normally he could just shut the voices by starting his new project, but every once in a while they wouldn’t go away. Today was one of those days.

He had come to the church this time, because it made sense to reconnect with his religion. He had been trying for years to find comfort in his decision to plot revenge using magic. But every time he thought he found forgiveness, it wore off when he used the power again, and he had to come back and on and on the cycle went. This time he wasn’t even sure what he was doing here. It felt like he didn’t belong in the building anymore, like he wasn’t allowed anymore. Eli was hovering before the building, finding the strength to get in, when an unfamiliar figure caught his eye. “I don’t think I have seen you here before.” He cocked his head to the side, staring the stranger up and down, looking for a conversation to distract him from the guilt.

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

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It wasn't a particulary pretty day today, but then again, Ashmoor was never a kingdom of beauty. It was one of advancement, of innovation and that of cutting edge. Of wanting to do anything it could in order to reach the top and look down on its surroundings. Alpha loved it. It was exactly what he wanted, what he needed. He had reached the top here, perhaps, but who knew what the future would hold?

Despite being slightly lost in his thoughts, the figure approaching hadn't gone unnoticed to him. It was a boy, simply just that. Alpha mimicked the movements of the other, cocking his head as well slightly. "Perhaps not, there are many needed to run the Church," he replied calmly. Alpha didn't scold the boy for not recognising him. While he had been wearing the mask for some time, Alpha had been working behind the scenes for at least the last half year. Taking care of the High Priest as he lay dying, conversing with the other priests and people of the church. Just to make sure that everything had gone right. "Are you here for a visit?" he inquired after in a welcoming tone. He could clearly see that something was bothering the other, but Alpha wasn't going to directly invade the other's privacy. He needed a little conversation first.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

On his way to the church, he just wanted to be in solitude. Whenever he was in the upper circle he wanted to disappear in the crowd, and if anyone would come to him to make conversation he would either walk away or politely decline. But now that he was here, the building intimidatingly staring him down like it knew, he would rather do anything than step inside. The guilt might eat him alive this time.

Eli never took notice of the members of the church, except the high priest. Nobody else matter really. So when an unknown figure standing in the entrance caught his eye, he couldn’t help but be interested. “I’ll take your word for it,” he answered, straightening his posture. The stranger was pretty peculiar in Eli’s opinion, and he wasn’t sure if he should be frightened or curious. “That’s why people come to churches yes,” he replied with a slight grin. Though everything told him not to go inside the building, he didn’t have much of choice now anymore did he? If he turned around now and walked away, it would be weird, and he would never be able to return. So Eli took the last few steps hesitantly, taking a deep breath once he was inside the building.

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

Alpha loved welcoming people, even though some might be frightened by his appearance. Soon enough though, word would spread who he was, and the people visiting would be prepared. He could see the man in front of him was unnerved, but Alpha decided not to get into it. Words wouldn't calm the other, false promises neither. So Alpha would just be on his best behaviour.

When the other replied with confirmation that he came to visit, Alpha gave a small smile and a nod. Unless there was a marriage or a funeral the High Priest wasn't aware of, this had been the expected answer. He took a small step aside and gestured towards the entrance. "Then be welcome. The Chuch of Renestrae is open to all," he spoke, his eyes momentarily looking at the ground before they shot up to look straight at the other, unblinking. "If there is anything you need or wish to talk about, please let me or someone else know. We are here to help," his baritone voice was soft, as was his gaze. He hoped he hadn't scared the boy away now.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

Open to all were the words the high priest used, and Eli had to stop himself from scoffing. He doubted he would be very welcome if he actually confessed to his crimes. It was tempting, however, to just ask if someone could offer a listening ear to his troubles. Maybe someone could tell him that what he was doing wasn’t so bad at all, that he hadn’t made the worst decision he could’ve made years ago. But he couldn’t risk telling anyone, that would mean he could never get the revenge he so desperately wanted, and everything would be for nothing. “That’s kind. Is that what you do here? Hear about people their everyday problems? That must be a bore,” he grinned, as he walked past the priest, further inside the church. Nothing had changed since the last time he’d met, which was comforting. “Tell me priest, what’s the most shocking thing you’ve ever heard someone confess?” He didn’t expect a straight honest answer, he suspected that the other wouldn’t just give that kind of information. No, Eli simply wanted to ask to see what the priests answer might be.

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

Maybe it was boring to just listen to people complain and how unhappy they were in their life. But there was something dignifying to it as well. He could be the listening ear, the shoulder to cry on, give the hand to hold. He had everything in his power to make people feel safe, to feel listened to. And in their words were secrets, confessions, things no one else would hear. And with that, they gave Alpha a sliver of power very few others could have.

Alpha hummed softly at the other's words. "It is but a sliver of what we do here. And if it is the thing that people need, than we will adhere to their requests," he answered calmly. He turned his back to the entrance, silently following the boy as he entered. "Many things have been confessed here, yet none of these words are stuck to the walls, nor to me. I cannot tell you," he said then. Confessions were never to be discussed with anyone else except for the one who made the confession. "Why are you inquiring to such things, if I may ask?" He watched the other with slightly narrowed eyes, wondering now if this man wasn't just here for visiting, but more for prying.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

Eli had come to the church with the intention to find some kind of acceptance of himself, but not to talk to anyone. He never talked to anyone when he came. He just silently asked forgiveness and hoped it was enough to ease his mind for a couple of months. But here he was, talking to a priest, forcing himself not to spill all his secrets and get a death sentence.

Eli cocked his head again. The priest certainly knew the meaning of the words patience. He didn’t seem to be bothered by the slightly annoying remarks Eli was making. ”so what else are you doing here then?” he asked genuinely interested. He didn’t know why he wanted to know exactly. Maybe because it would distract him more or maybe because he might find another way to keep true to his faith.

He felt trapped now he was inside the building. Not at all the feeling of peace that he usually got when he was in church. It must be because someone was paying attention to him. Eli hummed in respons, not surprised that the priest couldn’t tell him anything. ”I don’t know, why do you think I’m asking?” he shot the question back at him, trying not to reveal too much of the pain he was hiding.

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

The man besides him was a curious one. He asked questions that Alpha could answer but he rather did not. Working in this church needed dedication, dignity and of course, privacy. The latter was extremely important if he were to keep the trust of the people visiting. Telling everything this nosy boy wanted to know, would not help.

But Alpha did not let his distate for these questions show. "Many things. We have of course the task of keeping things clean, both the church and the surroundings, we pray, we help those in need, and the sermons of course. Have you ever been?" he returned a question, giving the other a curious gaze. He didn't seem the type for visiting sermons, especially not after this question. Alpha softly hummed, looking at the other for quite a while in silence. "I believe you ask because you need something else to talk about, or dare I say, think about," he spoke softly, as if they were suddenly dealing in secrets. No one ever came to church asking questions like these. They came here with a purpose, and it seemed this boy needed some distraction.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

Eli Dumont wrote:

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

He was very aware of himself, of the fact that he was ignoring his anxiety by making conversation with someone who could destroy him. Still, the walls seemed to move towards him now he was inside the building. He didn’t belong here, not anymore.

The things the priest summed up sounded super boring. Eli believed in his faith, but not so much that he’d want to spend all day listening to other people’s problems, or preaching and praying about it. He immediately felt guilt again when the thought popped up in his head. As if he was betraying his faith even more. “Yea, I’ve been,” he mumbled as an answer, pulling his eyes away from the man and looking around instead. The building did look very clean. It just surprised him that the priests took care of it. “That was years ago though.”

Eli was playing with fire here, he knew that, and still he couldn’t resist taking the risk. He was curious about that the priest was thinking about him. Turned out those thoughts came a little too close to the truth. Eli didn’t move a muscle though. “Do you?” he laughed. “Well, my recent clients are giving me a headache yes. So this conversation is a welcome distraction.” It wasn’t necessarily a lie. His business had been giving him headaches. It just wasn’t the thing he wanted to keep his mind from.

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

Alpha didn't expect much of the boy in front of him. The man seemingly didn't respect the house of Renestrae, asking intrusive questions and overall didn't seem to care much about what Alpha was telling him. The High Priest wasn't going to scold him for that. No, he would let the man be, he clearly needed something out of his system.

When the other told him that he hadn't visited the church for years, he knew that whatever this man was going to say about Renestrae, it wouldn't be true. In front of him was a non-believer, someone who truly didn't deserve the attention Alpha was giving him. But Alpha simply let out a silent sigh, folding his hands behind his back. "I see. What kind of work do you do, then?" he inquired, hoping to winn some information out of the man. "And I am happy to hear you have found a distraction," he followed, giving the other a nod. Though this distraction was costing Alpha precious time.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

He titled his head in surprise, studying the priest for a moment. “Why would you care what I do?” he asked a little amused. Eli didn’t think priests really care for the people they listened too. But maybe this man was giving him the opportunity to distract himself with a conversation, now that he knew. Eli wasn’t here for small talk though.

“You don’t sound very enthusiastic to have me here priest? Shouldn’t you be grateful people still come to your precious church?” He actually had no idea how many people visited the church. As far as he was concerned, everyone around him was highly religious. Hell, *he* was highly religious. That was the reason he was here after all. But the church was empty, and Eli couldn’t help but think that was strange.

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

Alpha watchedt he other carefully. This man sure liked to explore boundaries, see how far he could go until Alpha would lose his temper perhaps. But then he would need to go on for a very long time. Throughout the years, Alpha had honed his skill of remaining calm, while fuming on the inside ~~(Kinda like retail)~~. Losing his temper was never going to happen.

"I do, as I do with every person that wants to visit our Church," he responded calmly, his voice soft and cool. "We are grateful for every soul searching for sanctuary here, be it one, be it a hundred," he continued answering the other's questions. "Renestrae welcomes all that search for peace or refuge, and thus, so do we." He turned to look at one of the glass stained windows nearby, a colorful tale displayed of Renestrae's birth. "No matter where one would be, Renestrae will watch over them," Alpha hummed softly. He truly believed that, even though it felt like Renestrae's warmth had left him quite a while ago.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

Eli had been raised religious, he used to come to church all the time. His parents taught him he should follow his faith, that it would bring him peace and a good life. So far it had brought him nothing but sleepless nights. Faith didn’t stop his parents from being killed. Faith didn’t bring justice.

He studied the priest. He seemed so calm, Eli was almost impressed. He couldn’t really be this calm could he? Maybe he had gotten used to brats like him working on his nerves. “How very noble,” he muttered annoyed. His demeanor changed a little, from being annoying to simply annoyed. Eli loved his faith, he wouldn’t want to stop believing even if he could. It was a part his parents gave him that couldn’t be taken away. But he also felt betrayed by it. There was no peace to be found in his faith when he needed it most, and therefore he’d search another belief to cope. One that was slowly driving him insane. And this priest dared to stand there and tell him Renestrae would still be watching over him? “Until someone does something unforgivable, right?” He probably shouldn’t go there, but he couldn’t help it. He was feeling so small in this church, against this person who’d believed so fiercely in something. Something he could never do. Anger was taking hold of him.

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

Though Renestrae had been absent ever since his rise to power, Alpha had faith that she would return to him. She had never truly showed herself, he always blamed it on him being an outside. he turned to Renestrae quite late in his life, his family never been as religious as he was now. He had accepted her in his life, it was only now Renestrae's turn to accept him. Because he wasn't going to leave anytime soon.

The High Priest could feel that the emotions of the man in front of him were shifting towards a more negative space. Oh dear, was he not getting out of Alpha what he wanted to hear? Such a pity. "I am not quite sure I understand," he responded, returning his gaze to the other. He could guess what the other meant, but he wasn't going to fill in the blanks. No, he wanted to hear it from the man himself.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

09.19.2022

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

Eli was never quite good at managing his anger. But especially not when it came to the injustice that had been done to his family. He knew he was the one that had ran away, that he could’ve gone to someone for help. But back then he was too afraid to anyone to admit what had happened and he didn’t want to risk getting caught. He had been young, no one should blame him for his lack of action. No one should use it as an excuse for the fact that they allowed his parents killers to cover up the crime.

His anger often could get triggered by something someone said, or did. Someone who didn’t know what had happened to him specifically. This time it had been something related to his faith. Also something that had betrayed him it seemed. ”I’m just saying. Renestrae will watch over us until we make a mistake,” he clarified, his tone unchanged. ”Then she’s suddenly not so welcoming anymore,” he muttered, looking around the building once more, as if he was talking to the gods himself, instead of the priest.

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

Alpha didn't like it when people critized the Faith of Renestrae. Especially not under her roof. The man before him had courage, but it was misplaced. Nevertheless, the High Priest remained calm and collected, letting his anger burn inside of him instead of lashing out to the other.

There definitely was a history behind the words of the other. One that Alpha couldn't decipher yet. But he would try. "It pains me to hear that Our Lady has hurt you," he replied, calm as ever. He wasn't letting this boy's insolence get to his head. "I will pray for the betterment of your life," he continued, intertwining his hands together as he spoke. It pained him to see someone so lost from his faith. But perhaps the right words might get him back on track.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

Eli knew it probably wasn't the best idea to start this against a prïest of an Peoples. But when there had been guilt before, there now was hate. Why should he feel guilty? Renestrae was the one that had abandoned him when he needed her most. He couldn't find peace in his faith. He feit powerless, betrayed, hopeless. But when he'd turned to magic, that feeling was wonderful. The power buzzing in his hands as he put it in the weapons and objects in
his workshop. He never considered using it for any other purpose, he didn't have to. Eli knew exactly what he wanted to use it for. And after that he would never practices it again. Live his quiet middle ring life instead. Maybe even without faith at all.

The priest seemed to catch upon his feelings. Eli was aware that he could 've been more suptle, but did he really want to be? Maybe he wanted the trouble. Either way, he didn't given the priest a reaction other than a dark look. "You will pray for me?" he scoffed. "Right, what a relief." Eli shook his head. "I'm sure that will fix every thing."

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

he wondered sometimes what people came here for, if they were so angry about their faith. Alpha wished he had a direct line with Renestrae, that he could simply just call her and right all the wrongs in the world. But no, he h ad yet to receive any answer from his God. So whatever this man was trying to achieve, he would never reach his goal.

Time seemed to slowly tick by, this conversation only prolonging with every breath they took. Behind his mask, the High Priest frowned. "Then, pray tell, what would you want me do?" he asked directly, his eyes immediately shooting back to the other. The pleasant tone having faded from his voice, a cold undertone replacing it. "Tell me, what bothers you, what have you come here for? Your words can flow freely here," he continued, speaking more friendly again. His dark eyes softened again. He should not let himself slip like that. "You will not be judged. Nor by me, nor by Her." Maybe this would finally push the man to tell Alpha what was bothering him. His patience was getting rather thin.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

Eli didn’t need anyone praying for him, and never had. He couldn’t find peace in that. Only acceptance from Renestrae herself would ease his guilt. Normally, anyway. Because right now he was more furious with his god than ever before. And in their church of all places. A sensible part of him knew he had to leave. That that would be the best course of action, but the fury was too great to listen to reason right now. He didn’t even mind his words anymore.

Eli kept silent as the priest spoke. He didn’t need the other to do anything except go away. He shouldn’t even have been here in the first place. If he’d just let Eli be it all would’ve been fine. ”I don’t believe that,” he snapped. ”All She does is judge.” He shook he head again. He’d prayed day and night for Her forgiveness, and She’d been silent for years now. Maybe he wasn’t the problem anymore. Eli turned his back to the priest, and looked at the altar for a moment. Maybe he should just, let go of all the guilt. ”I’ve had it,” he mumbled, before turning around again. ”Well, this had been a delight.” Eli slipped back into his arrogant self again, ignoring the angry beating of his heart. ”But if you don’t mind, I’ve got some things to take care of.” The sooner he was out of this building, the better.

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

If this boy expected some miracle from the High Priest, he could wait for a very long time. Alpha had been waiting for a sign ever since he took up this position, so they would be in the same boat. But whatever it was this man was waiting for, Alpha could not give it to him.

In fact, the sheer presence as High Priest seemed to annoy the other. Alpha wondered why. Had he done something to him in the past? He couldn't remember this one's face as one he had seen before, yet one he had hurt. Besides, Alpha wasn't someone who simply would hurt people for fun. Alpha decided not to go further into the discussion that was brewing on the edge of this conversation. "Of course, I will not keep you in a place you do not want to be in," he replied humbly with a slight nod of his head. "But before you go, I would like to know with whom I had the pleasure of conversing with," he asked. This was the least the other could give him besides the arrogant persona he'd been showing off.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE

I’D LIKE TO LIVE LONG ENOUGH

Maybe it was a good thing he’d come across the priest. If he didn’t have this conversation, Eli would’ve never realized how much Renestrae had abandoned him when he needed Her the most. Now Eli saw it clearly. The whole reason for his unhappiness was because of his damned faith. Because he was still hoping to be saved my it, because he was constantly looking for approval.

He was done asking. It was time he took matters in his own hands.

No need to alarm the priest though. Eli slid back into his usual personality without any problems. Even though the fire that had ignited within him raged on. He wasn’t looking for confirmation that he could go, and yet he waited until the priest nodded before he started moving towards the door. Once he reached the doorway, one last question was asked.

Eli could’ve kept walking, could’ve ignored the question altogether, or give some kind of witty remark again. But instead, he stopped and turned around. Never in the past ten years had he freely given his full name, but something about looking at the new priest against enraged him even more. “Elijah Percival Dumont,” he simply answered, before turning around and leaving the building. If he was about to abandon the thing that had grounded him most, he might as well let the thing closest to Her know who She’d lost.

TO BE SOMEONE ELSE.

Feeling sad? Join a cult!

Alpha would have loved to save the man, to understand him and get to know him, offer him help where he needed it. But it was obvious to him that the boy was closed off. He didn't want any help, he had simply come here to realise one thing and one thing only. Renestrae would never help him. Alpha pitied him, though he wasn't the kind of person to force him on his knees and repent.

No, instead he simply asked for a name. That was all that mattered in this moment. A name so that this boy would feel the consquences. And his family as well. Alpha watched him go, quietly awaiting an answer. It took a moment, but eventually he got it. And it was marvellous. The High Priest didn't say anything else, just simply let him go. Only when he knew the other truly had left the holy grounds of the Church, did he mumble to himself. "Dumont you say..." The High Priest turned around, letting himself get swallowed by the darkness of the corridors that would lead to his chambers. There would be no parents or family to feel the consquences. Alpha knew exactly who Eli was. After all, his mentor had orchestrated it all. Or perhaps... someone else.

@Eli Dumont

FROM MITZI WITH LOVE